Live in your own dream

I don’t remember when I planted the seeds of literature in my heart. I only remember that when I was very young, my second sister and I studied in the same school. However, as soon as I went to school, my elder sister was taken to his Township Middle School by my father to study. Seeing my sister sitting behind my father’s bicycle drifting away, my heart was unexpectedly filled with little disappointment. At that time, I am looking forward to my sister coming home. After a week, I went to the village to pick her up, and my sister always brought me some surprises, such as a story, a young literary book, a song she just knew to sing. Of course, I didn’t let my sister go. I asked her to tell me stories about what movies she watched in school and what interesting things happened in school. If it brought me a book named young literature and art, I would forget everything. At that time, it was my first time to get in touch with extracurricular books, and I felt very surprised: dodder could dance? Fructus xanthii talking? The beautiful little snowflake turned out to be a fairy? The unspeakable good feeling after reading the book can still be realized up to now. It was at that time that I began to fall in love with reading, but in the era of material poverty, extracurricular reading materials were very few, and a book named young literature and art was often broken by me, then I hope my sister or father can bring me a new one. In fact, at the beginning of school, I didn’t even know how to write pinyin. Others were writing it, and I was just there in a daze. At that time, my brain was dull and dull, but I didn’t know how long it took for me to get started with learning. Unexpectedly, I often got praise from my teacher. Since the second grade, one of my relatives has taught me Chinese. He cares about me very much and often asks me to teach students to read new words and texts on the blackboard, my Chinese scores were almost the best in my class every time, and I gradually fell in love with Chinese. At that time, there was no composition class in the class. I didn’t know the relationship between composition class and reading, and I wouldn’t use what I saw in my own composition. So I looked at the composition test paper of the fourth grade to the fifth grade, and only cried there. Now think about it, although my relative didn’t teach me to write a composition, it led me to fall in love with Chinese, so at every stage of learning Chinese, I was full of enthusiasm to learn, including the language structure and characters of each text, I studied them carefully. When I was in the fifth grade of primary school, my father took me to his school again. At that time, my sister had already been admitted to high school. I am very lucky. The head teacher and Chinese teacher who taught me the fifth grade are also my relatives and my cousin. Naturally, he also cares about me very much. In order to live up to his concern, I always study hard. At that time, I began to learn to write compositions slowly. My cousin corrected the composition for me. I felt that he was very careful. When he often criticized in person, he pointed out which sentence was not fluent and which word was wrong. My composition scores also gradually came up. At that time, the number of extra-curricular books I got in touch with gradually increased. Looking at the beautiful articles written by others, I was very envious. It seemed that at that time, I stood in the boiling campus, looking at the noisy students in the yard, thinking about a question: The writer is really good, I can publish the articles I wrote in the book, when, I also want to be a writer. At that time, I was very naive and funny, thinking that a writer was very easy to be a writer. As long as he wanted to write it, he would certainly be able to write it. I spent my wonderful primary school days and went to junior high school. The school has not changed, and it is still in this campus. At that time, teacher Wang Fuben taught me. He was a very serious person. My composition scores are good. He often circled my composition and drew out sentences that were well written. More often, he would copy my whole composition on the blackboard and explain it to his classmates. What I remember most clearly was that I wrote a composition written by Grandpa, in which I wrote a sentence that Grandpa said, “I am thinking that you should come back this week, The teacher said that the word was well used, and then told the whole class where it was good. At that time, what I expected most was the composition class. The mood after being praised and praised by the teacher was as sweet as honey. Under the teacher’s praise and encouragement, it is often the teacher who arranges a composition. I always write two or three essays, and the teacher will correct them one by one. Now think about it. At that time, the teacher’s task was very heavy. He needed to be criticized by others in his composition, and also pointed out the advantages and disadvantages. Therefore, I am still very grateful to teacher Wang in junior high school. It was he who kept my passion and hobby for literature, and gradually moved to the Palace of literature. At that time, I began to secretly write poems and novels without telling everyone. The first novel I wrote was a love story of being a soldier. I thought it was very beautiful at that time, and I didn’t show it to anyone. After finishing it, I appreciated myself there. I also wrote poems. Pages of poems appeared on my composition. When I was praised, my heart was proud and my vanity was also satisfied for a while. At that time, the most proud work I wrote was an article about students’ life, which imitated Liu Yuxi’s “humble room inscription”. Unfortunately, I didn’t know where I lost it for so many years. When I was in junior high school, what I was most willing to do was to hide in my father’s room to do newspaper clippings when I was not in class. Because my father was a leader, the unit set up a lot of newspapers, Wenbao, Volkswagen daily and so on, which would be sent to his room. I read them one by one. With good articles, I cut them off and stuck them on a special notebook. At that time, I spent all day studying and busy, I don’t know how many scrapbooks I have made. I think if I can keep it now, it should be a lot of wealth. My senior high school was in No. 2 Middle School. At that time, due to physical reasons, I always asked for leave, so my homework was delayed a lot, and I couldn’t keep up with math and physics gradually. Moreover, I preferred literature, so I chose liberal arts without hesitation. At that time, for the college entrance examination, all of us were desperate Saburo. How could we have spare time to read the extracurricular books we liked! In this way, dreams are deeply pressed in the bottom of my heart. I have never had time to think about this question. That year, I was admitted to Taian coal industry School. I felt very depressed because I didn’t realize my ideal. I began to take up the pen and write about my inner feelings, as well as some things I experienced personally. I also actively participated in the literature activities organized in the school. I remember that soon after I entered school, the school organized everyone to contribute. I wrote an article about military training, but I was selected by them, and I was also able to enter the literary society. I became a member of the literary society, and activities gradually increased. The number of students who like writing gradually increased. We wrote, chatted and went to the library together. We felt so beautiful and full in our hearts. At that time, I wrote all the large and small manuscripts in the class. I became more and more famous. I became a talented woman recognized in their eyes, but I felt that I was very few, it’s just that I can write some romantic words, which are not worth making a fuss, let alone mentioning. At that time, the most time I spent was taking a small notebook, going to the library, reading various magazines and famous works at home and abroad, and then extracting some useful things for myself. After breaking away from the bitter life in high school, the students became bold and more people fell in love with each other. I looked at them one by one, there is an impulse to write a youth novel. But, When I wrote more than 10,000 words, I couldn’t write any more. Because of laziness, and because of my limited writing ability indeed. However, I was not willing to throw away the more than 10,000 words I wrote. Although I moved six or seven times only, many letters and useful things were lost during the moving process, but only these ten thousand words, I protected it like a treasure, and didn’t throw it away as waste paper. Today, more than ten years later, I write a full-length novel and enrich it into my novel. It reminds me of my girlhood, those lost and abandoned things, and my unrealized dream. When the university was about to graduate, another large-scale essay-writing activity was held in the school, which was hosted by Qingdao. My work was selected. Later, the editor sent a letter and also sent a greeting card with the signatures of many editors. They said that I wrote very well and asked me to write another article and send it to them. Because I was busy with graduation, I didn’t reply to the editor or write an article. I became a teacher, but actually being a teacher was not my ideal. A person in a remote small town often hides himself in his own small room to read books and write articles after class. I wrote articles one after another, and threw them one after another, and the result was that all the mud bull entered the sea. Occasionally one or two editors will reply and point out my shortcomings. The happiest thing for me was that the article “Teacher’s Day lyric” I wrote was published in Yuncheng education, and the contribution fee was four yuan. My father took more than ten miles to retrieve it for me. Although there were only four pieces, I tasted the happiness of turning my works into typeface. Now I recall that kind of time, which is simple and full, full of passion and hope. I have classes during the day and read books I like at night. That kind of situation is so beautiful. I am a layman, it is inevitable to go the way everyone has to go, get married and have children. Then I am busy with trifles, housework and work. My life is not easy, it can also be said to be very tired, very tired. It seems that life is always against me. I treat my family with all my heart, but what I gain is harm. I was helpless, resentful and even desperate. It was literature that saved me in those painful and lonely days. When I suffered injustice, I looked for answers and ways of relief in the book. Reading has purified my soul and thoughts, making me find the reason and confidence to live in despair again and again. Although I seldom write more words, I still unconsciously accumulate my writing. In the office, in the principal’s office, newspapers abandoned by others are often my spiritual food. It is literature that makes me survive hard in the cracks, leaving me a beauty of the world. Even, the scenes that happened circled and circled in my mind, hoping that one day I could write them down. Ten years passed by in a hurry. I smelt the smell of words and unexpectedly met Sister LV because of an encounter. The heart-to-heart talk and communication again and again inspired my inner dream of writing. It was she that made me realize the beauty of words again and how strong my pursuit of words was. I finally calmed down and began to sort out my thoughts. The child fell asleep, I found a few pieces of rotten paper and began to try to write. On the first night, I wrote more than 1,000 words. In this way, I wrote it day by day, one chapter, two chapters, three chapters, oh my God! I wrote more than 50,000 words! Just writing like this is not a way, I should post it online. Therefore, during the Spring Festival in 2011, I lost articles wholeheartedly in front of the computer, and I didn’t feel tired, because I found a platform for myself on the Internet, the words written by a nobody can also be published, although it is far from the paper publication. However, I still have a passion and an expectation. I hope that the number of clicks will be more, and I hope that my words can be praised by everyone. Everything is difficult at the beginning, but once you start, it seems to be difficult to stop. Writing became my normal state. As long as my child slept, I sat in front of the computer and knocked. Every day, the child wakes up after typing more than 1,000 words. I took my children to play and conceived for the next chapter. I have not received any special writing training and education. So when I write articles, it is usually like acting in a movie, one story plot and one story plot. I write whatever I think of, no matter whether I have literary talent or not, no matter whether the structure is reasonable or not, those thoughts flowing in my heart unexpectedly made me not stop much. Every chapter I wrote was in a breath. The words accumulated in my heart for many years have been written out, which unexpectedly made me happy. I wrote more than 8000 words at most, which was already the limit for me. My body does not allow me to write more. Those online writers, Day of code on 10 thousands or 20 thousands-word, for me is just too hard to imagine. That’s me, adhere to the ten months, wrote 360,000 words of the novel “Angel of the war” I finally breathed a sigh of relief that others might write for fame and wealth. However, I just wanted to vent. After finishing writing, my heart became much relaxed and most of my illness got better. Although the novel is not well written, maybe it is just a running account, maybe it is naive to others, but after all, it is a transcendence for me. I have always thought that my heart has dried up because of the trifles and entanglement of life, and I can no longer write words. In fact, I was wrong. Whether this article is good or bad, I can keep writing it down, which has proved that I still have medicine to save in words. I reexamined myself, I also believe in myself again. In the future, this pen in hand cannot be lost. I know that I still lack basic skills and enthusiasm in writing long articles. No matter the examination, the conception, the structure or the literary talent, I will pay more attention to and learn from now on. But I couldn’t stop. I started to write short stories and tried to contribute. Unexpectedly, several articles were published. I have confidence again. I know that the road of literature is not that easy. However, literature can save people’s lives and make people live with goals and pursuits; It can also make people’s spiritual life more rich and colorful. After thinking it over, the dream of literature has never been far away from myself for so many years. I am very lucky that I have been living in my dream all the time. I hope that I can live in my dream forever in the future.

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