A letter from a strange woman

In countless sleepless nights, I stared at the night with my eyes wide open. Anxiety and fear covered my eyes. Yes, I am not willing to sleep like this. I fell asleep, one day passed, and another day was coming. Me at a loss. I can’t say clearly what I’m afraid of, and I can’t tell those emotions. They are always silent in the bottom of my heart, suppressed by me. But it was like a volcano roaring in a low voice, desperately trying to rush out of the cliff. I can’t control my emotions. I originally created them, but now I will become their slave. They drove me to keep thinking and suffering from the suspicion and doubt day after day. I was overwhelmed by the flood of emotions inch by inch, like a dying ant, trying to catch the last straw. In the silent and dead night, I always fall into the dilemma created by myself. But I do feel a constraint all the time. That is a shackle that covers my heart. The surging emotions occupied all of me, and I became a person completely dominated by emotions. So I was irrevocably attacked by neuroticism and insanity. But if it were not for them, I would not be able to write, and I would lose the inspiration and motivation of writing. I am neither a poet nor a philosophy. What I rely on is these trivial and complicated thoughts. If God did not give me the power of writing, I would not survive. Who can tell me how to be the master of my emotions? I don’t understand that we live under the same land and sky, but we can never meet each other. We walk on the same road every day, watch the same sunset, and sink in such a glorious and sad manner. Step on the same grassland and pass the same lakeside. I cursed my ridicule and cowardice to God. Even I couldn’t tell what I am was afraid. There was a wall in my heart. I fortified the outside world and refused to be crossed by others. I think about the past and the future, I am make too many mistakes and sins. I have already felt deeply guilty, and I am not willing to forgive myself. When I walk alone in the crowd, I am most afraid of someone calling out my name suddenly. It was like that I was uncovered in public and my blood flowed into a river in full view of the public. I wish the whole world would not know me. I never dared to stay in the crowd for too long. I was afraid that I would see that shadow as soon as I raised my head. I was afraid of the appearance of that face, which made my spine cold. I knew that face was looking at me behind me again. When I turned around and looked at it, I shouted in panic, “Who are you? The face sneered and asked, who are you? You are scared, afraid that you don’t know who to confess? Who should I pray for forgiveness? I think I am should confess. So I pulled out a pen in the dark and drew some words on the white paper casually by the faint light. I hugged and cried with these words. The paper and pen make me feel the most safe. They are always silent, but full of silent and rich language. Only when my eyes see them and my fingers touch them can I feel extremely steadfast. This letter, from a strange woman, is written to the same strange you. Never met you. (This article is purely an imitation of the delicate and sensitive psychological description in Zweig’s letter from a strange woman.) Like (prose editor: Shu Kuang) the snow in spring Spring elimination snow, multi-the yao nian, unspoken. Reading from afar, it is just above that snowfield. The snow is really beautiful, after all it is spring… Waiting Waiting is a kind of persistence, sticking to a certain belief and never giving up. Maybe because of a certain commitment, or because of a certain… Be good at listening to different voices and opinions On October 6th, I published a travel essay: “beautiful autumn scenery”, which was obtained by many literary websites… Read The Bridges of Madison County “When the white moth spreads its wings, you can come to me at any time”. I think, if I am a man, be accepted… From today on, I want to be happy I read “the biography of Hulan River” long time ago, and I remember that I was really in a heavy mood for a long time. Which characters caused me… Sick time I sneezed one after another these days. I said someone was reading me and others said I was sick. Finally, the doctor also said I was…

Early autumn

On the sunny day of early autumn, the sunshine is warm, the wind is cool, the willow is graceful, the autumn insects hidden in the grass are singing in the afternoon, and the fat caterpillar crawls anxiously on the ground to find a way out. The garden has been unmanaged for a long time, with overgrown weeds, and the originally planted flowers are submerged. Two days ago, I suddenly saw a small yellow flower in the garden, and the white butterfly was dancing and playing in the flowers. It turned out to be bitter rape, which happened to bloom in this season. But a new idea came out. Sometimes when I rest at home, I will voluntarily weed in the garden, with the smell of various kinds of straw juice on my hands. There is a small piece of green vanilla in the garden, but during a summer, a lot of papyrus grows in it. When weeding, sometimes the leaves of vanilla are rolled up, and the slightly bitter straw juice in the palm is mixed with a slight vanilla flavor. The wind in early autumn afternoon is also cool, although the sunshine is still a little warm. This weather is the most pleasant one. A piece of white or purple bean covered with fence. The melon seedlings on the haystack stand upright with large leaves and yellow flowers facing the sun. The corn cobs in the field are almost ripe. The leaves of the bean seedling turn yellow. Although there is still a large green in front of us, it is not the lively green in spring but the dark green. It is the green with time, and the green full of attachment before saying goodbye to the world. When a gust of wind passes by, some leaves that grow old too early will fall down. Every day, the floor is full of wind. Sitting on the stone bench, I will listen to the wind quietly in the shade of the tree. The Sunshine sent the shadow of the willow to me. The shadow on the ground is swaying, just like the ripples shaking on the water surface. I like listening to the sound of wind. The sound of wind between flowers and plants is like butterfly stirring its wings, which is the tenderness of whispers. The wind among the Willows is just like its graceful, rustling and soft. The leaves rub and pacify each other, which is the chatting of ancient beauties. The sound of Hongda came from Poplar Forest. The tall and robust figure of Poplar is no more arrogant than its loud shouts. Even if a small gust of wind passes through, it also arouses the echo like spray. If there is a strong wind, it will be turbulent. The wind is either gentle or surging, or through the whispers of the soul, or to wash away the feelings of love and hate in the chest. Wanton and pure will eventually calm down. If you lie on the sunny grass, you will be a little member of the nature, the same experienced, treacherous and reader. Maybe I will never understand the mystery of nature and the connotation of life, but at this moment, it is a great happiness to experience the sunshine and the wind physically and mentally. The blue sky, white clouds and sunshine in early autumn are not only my favorites, but also those of swallows, sparrows and all unknown birds. It is the love of bees and butterflies. They are dancing happily and singing happily. Even if the cold is coming, they also know their own destination. As long as the sunshine in the daytime is still sunny and warm, it will still be a beautiful day. I don’t know when the haze will come, but I will leave eventually. Just like the cold and hot seasons, the sunny and rainy weather. Some people say that the sufferings and difficulties in the world, disputes and disturbances are just a practice in this life. Someone once encouraged me to convert to religion and find spiritual support. And I always stay away from religion. Whether it is the creation of God or the gift of nature, enjoying all kinds of scenery, listening to all kinds of wonderful sounds, tasting coarse and light or delicate food is both enjoyable and inevitable. People are nothing more than emotional or rational feelings and thoughts. It was just like the high sky in autumn, which could accommodate the bright sunlight and the heavy rain and strong wind. Strive to be a broad-minded person. I am willing to be calm in this world of practice. Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the snow in spring Spring elimination snow, multi-the yao nian, unspoken. Reading from afar, it is just above that snowfield. The snow is really beautiful, after all it is spring… Waiting Waiting is a kind of persistence, sticking to a certain belief and never giving up. Maybe because of a certain commitment, or because of a certain… Be good at listening to different voices and opinions On October 6th, I published a travel essay: “beautiful autumn scenery”, which was obtained by many literary websites… Read The Bridges of Madison County “When the white moth spreads its wings, you can come to me at any time”. I think, if I am a man, be accepted… From today on, I want to be happy I read “the biography of Hulan River” long time ago, and I remember that I was really in a heavy mood for a long time. Which characters caused me… Sick time I sneezed one after another these days. I said someone was reading me and others said I was sick. Finally, the doctor also said I was…