Nirvana after pursuit

I deposited your breath in my dream. In this noisy and impetuous society, in this era of steel chaos, I ran on the hot and dry afternoon, through the dark, lonely and horrible deep forest, through the crowded heads, we can only say: you are not what I pursue! Wedge I just want to find a kind of breath! In the eyes of the common people, the treasure in my eyes is like a bow! After the rainstorm, the deep gray clouds are like those things once reached. But now, with this fresh and turbid breath, it suddenly disappeared so abruptly. Even those fragments have not been left. Please forgive me, I have to use such objective and one-sided fragments to explain. Can’t I give up the meaning of the words themselves to me, if I am a little rich? I still have to pretend to say with relief: in fact, I have already put it down. What I pursue is not yours! Cangyang jiatuo said: for many years, you have been living in my wound. I have put down the world, but I have never put down you. You can say goodbye one by one in my life. Time is except life and death. Which one is not meddling. You said: You said you were just a wandering writer. With young dreams in the impetuous city full of steel bars. You said: you live in the prison with text hypothesis, taking the city as the background, or a mirage, wandering in the hot and dry afternoon. In the remote streets with indifferent human feelings, in the gray and black alleys with street lamps, under the advertisement cloth which was constantly mustered by the wind. I said: I am just a stranger from other places, searching for the free and easy words in the streets of people. I said: dear, we can be the same passers-. After being attached by words. The flowers are gradually charming! Daily Morning. The car drove across the street with mottled shadows of trees and roared off, leaving only residual dust. The surrounding noisy music flowed into the air from the CD store and was locked into thought-provoking words by us. The wandering artists who perform on the street, like us, are preparing for a brilliant start. We use silent words to fall into the pure white letter paper. The epitome in this city. We enjoy the pleasure that the city of nuoda is dissected and analyzed into words one by one by us. We so much fun. You look! Such a romantic city was compressed into different words one after another by us. And these different words reveal the same you. I am the joy? Or the sorrow? Cities are aging in words. Without the silent trace of time, is the eardrum familiar with the sound of the rapid youth tide, or is the city forcing me to ignore the strange separation. There is no wandering artist performing on the street, and no romantic beginning in the text! The CD machines in the video stores are Mozart’s indifferent off-site streets, and the gray and black alleys with street lamps are under the shabby advertising cloth which is constantly rising in the wind. Everything remains there with a domineering attitude after you leave. Yes! I understand that only I am the real passer-! Some people say that the greatest loneliness in the world is neither being alone nor being alone in the crowd. It is a song of harmony but not harmony. When you left, you said: you only have your words, and I am just an extra supporting role. However, there was clearly an image of US shivering outside the window and rubbing our hands with each other under the warm yellow shade of street lamps. Obviously, when the 13th black car stepped on the mottled traces of the tree shadow silently, promises made. You forgot. We said: We should always pursue words. Let he improving. And it is the same as Qiao Feng in Jin Yong’s works. He and his kung fu, I and my words are combined into one. Is it the overdone pursuit of the devil, or the Exhaustion overwhelmed by the indifference of reality. In the 13th night of the rainstorm, in the 13th month of the 13 stars. We all paid the due price for our pursuit., Whether it is full of scars or tired heart. Everything begins to Nirvana, or never reborn. Some people say: Everyone will pursue something in this world. But what I finally got was often not the main product I had pursued at the beginning. It turns out that what I pursue is not you! And what I got between Nirvana and rebirth was just a tired heart. Besides, is there any stumbling past covered with thorns. Postscript Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) change the way to continue to stay with this city I went out at 6 o’clock in the morning and came back at almost 8 o’clock in the evening. From beginning to end, I only welcomed myself with silence; Since I went to college, on weekends… [Original essay] string words Since winter, the sky is dry and the snow is misty. The whole earth is desolate and empty. Whether your mood is like a year, or… Forever military dream Forever military Dream (Ma Xiaochun, Kangle county, Gansu province) memories are like meteors, passing through the unmarked and blurred eyes, and the outline gradually… Spring rain I like spring rain like everything on the Earth. Just after the new year, the sky began to rain. I really like the spring in Jiangnan… Plucked the snowflakes of Dreams (modified) Near the new year, the first snow fell. I was surprised to read a long scroll in the morning, the white one is snow, and the gray one is tree… Self The fashion is transient, and the style is permanent. Things that can shine on others may not be put here. In…

Bowls of looking

If I came out from home, the first thing I encountered was rows of tall buildings. With their solid and huge bodies, they couldn’t help blocking my warm looking. My eyes hit the silver-gray wall, and then I was bounced back like table tennis. I felt the unspeakable anxiety and pain in my eyes and heart. In fact, the buildings in this beautiful Jiangnan town I live in are getting higher and higher. This small town is expanding crazily along the two sides of Shaxi vertically, just like there are two invisible giant hands pushing the wheel of the small town to change with each passing day or prosper. I was submerged in such a hard and dense high-rise Canyon. I looked back again and again ardently, just like the wings broken by the proud eagle in flight, therefore, my ups and downs heart is filled with inexplicable anxiety, anxiety and endless confusion. If I could go further, if I walked to the bank of Shaxi River, suburb or all places with broad vision, my gaze would not stretch too far. I looked here, I looked over there, I saw the blue backbone of rolling mountains, which were far away from me, but they were much taller than the buildings in the city, there is an irresistible majesty and power. I finally wriggled there alone like a worm. I couldn’t see further and more thoroughly. My bright eyes were blocked back, just like some glittering fragments of lightning, they fell sadly one after another. In the narrow gap between the Earth and time, I heard the twitching of my heart and silent crying. I was like a worm that no one found. I wriggled in the flying dust in the world, it seems that I don’t know what year it is. I have been silently looking around and living in the basin for many years. Before that, I walked in the vast northeast plain. In the cold winter in summer, even in the spring days when the seedlings on the fields were not flourishing, I could indulge in grazing my free eyes. I can see from one village to another. I can see the faint and indistinct horizon. I can see the rain in the wandering clouds in the distance and the Sunshine flowing behind the clouds, even later in the vast Northwest, my looking eyes would not easily break like sharp flying arrows. For example, I stand on the top of the Tianshan Mountains, for example, I stand deep in the sand sea, and I am always surrounded by a kind of vast magnificence or generous solemn and stirring. I stood there, like a real person. White clouds were like washing or the sky was high. How important it was to me. What’s more important is that I heard my free breath and heartbeat. My looking eyes are unobstructed, and my looking eyes are like countless soft flying feathers, my looking eyes can reach all directions smoothly. Do you know the vastness and magnificence? It is a sacred place that makes people open-minded and soul-stirring. Even if a person is very humble, he will not feel his humble, fragile and lost as long as he appears in such a sacred place. Just like a grass on a high mountain, it is much higher than a luxuriant tree growing on a depression. My father once lived in a small town ten years ago, but later he never wanted to come again. This farmer, who has worked hard on the plain for most of his life, has been used to the sunrise and sunset there and the birth, aging, illness and death there. He stayed in the small town of Jiangnan for more than a month, and he was also agitated and chattered for more than a month. I could feel that my father was like a flying bird in a cage, which reminded me of my unforgettable experience when I first came to the small city. My father said why there are mountains all around, it is too oppressed and depressed here! Looking at my father’s unhappy expression, I really want to say that this place is the Meilie Basin. This city is built on both sides of the narrow Shaxi River. It is said that the Kuomintang set up a concentration camp here before liberation. But I didn’t say anything. I just looked at my father who was eager to return with the same sympathy. In fact, I know little about the history of the rise of Jiangnan. I just feel that everything here is fresh and strange. But I don’t like the sunrise or sunset in basins or depressions, just as I don’t like the comfortable and closed lifestyle of people in small cities. But I must get used to these slowly, just like a sheep running on the grassland. In order to survive and breathe freely, I must learn to look for food or dream in the longitudinal forest. I thought I had been used to it for so many years, but in fact it was not the case. Just like my unhidden dream, I always dream back to the Great Plains of Northeast China and the Gobi mountains or grasslands in northwest China, where the mighty and mighty of a horse and plain makes me dream. But when I woke up from a dream, I still curled up in the basin, smiling alone or crying secretly in the small city surrounded by mountains. I know how important a person’s position and environment are, just like a frog in the bottom of a well, the sky it watches is so small. Although I don’t think people living in small cities are frogs at the bottom of the well, you can’t deny the influence or shelter of environment on one’s mind. What I said was that I was far from adapting to the world and climate in the basin. That kind of comfortable and comfortable life was no different from a silent murder to my excited soul. In many passing nights and days, I hid under the tall eaves of the small town, looking around or picking up the fragments of scattered eyes. I couldn’t convince myself, so I started to run away or flee again and again. But where can a person in a wheelchair escape? Finally, I came back obediently and returned to the small town to the warm nest. I fell in love with a woman and slept together at night to have children. I found that I was much older soon. In the place where my eyes were blocked or broken again and again, I felt that my grazing eyes finally gathered into my heart sadly, Like a beam of clear icy and cold moonlight, my slow beating heart was deeply submerged. In fact, I am still eager for my blood to run like rivers, and my eyes to fly like soft feathers. But I feel that something has locked me. Is it the atmosphere of the basin or the world in the basin? I don’t want to know, I really want to say to my heart: Do you really want the joy of flying? When I got the affirmative answer, I became more and more trapped. I am want to complete a spiritual breakthrough? I am want to stand on the top of the mountain opposite the city? My eyes fell sadly on the wheelchair in the corner of the room, and my heart began to feel endless pain at that moment. I don’t know when, my hand holding the pen has become weak and weak. What I love is those tender and romantic words. I feel my decline, decadence and spiritual collapse. In countless alternating nights and days, I never took pains to ask myself: Can I still be bold and vigorous in writing? Can I still climb high and look at the mountains? Can I still let my inner blood flow like rivers? How eager I am that what flows out from my pen tube is not pale water, but crimson blood or smelly tears? But it seems that I have already been overwhelmed. Being alone in the bottom of fate is far more horrible and helpless than living in the basin. I longed for the joy of being blown or torn by the fierce desert like a camel in the desert of thousands of miles, but the grand scenery had long been far away from me. I just crouched up in the basin of fate, and my hot prying or looking eyes were blocked by the hard and straight Mountain again and again. I found that I had become shortsighted and vulgar. In the turbulent turbid flow of the world of mortals, who on earth covered my eyes? When I questioned myself like this, an eagle in the distant sky had already folded its proud wings, and I fell down with a withered hand holding a pen, I saw the sad running Red Snow Fox in the wilderness. I saw the sunrise or sunset in the distance, bending my leaning sky and deep in the quiet night, reading Guo Xiaochuan’s poems alone, I found the autumn of tuanpowa which was gradually left out and forgotten again, and saw the magnificent spirit of a poet who refused to compromise to life in the low valley of fate, the quiet blood gradually began to make noise or high tide. When I fell into my dream in the narrow Jiangnan town, I was chasing the sunset of the long river or the lonely smoke in the desert wildly all the way. At another spiritual height there, I seemed to have accomplished a solemn Breakthrough. I was doomed to be unable to be imprisoned or compromised. Even in the narrow cage of bad luck, my fervent eyes would cross over the vast rivers and mountains. 2600 words Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) change the way to continue to stay with this city I went out at 6 o’clock in the morning and came back at almost 8 o’clock in the evening. From beginning to end, I only welcomed myself with silence; Since I went to college, on weekends… [Original essay] string words Since winter, the sky is dry and the snow is misty. The whole earth is desolate and empty. Whether your mood is like a year, or… Forever military dream Forever military Dream (Ma Xiaochun, Kangle county, Gansu province) memories are like meteors, passing through the unmarked and blurred eyes, and the outline gradually… Spring rain I like spring rain like everything on the Earth. Just after the new year, the sky began to rain. I really like the spring in Jiangnan… Plucked the snowflakes of Dreams (modified) Near the new year, the first snow fell. I was surprised to read a long scroll in the morning, the white one is snow, and the gray one is tree… Self The fashion is transient, and the style is permanent. Things that can shine on others may not be put here. In…

Students Suo Ji

There are three railways in life: we went through the window together, we carried guns together, we went down to the countryside together, and we naturally talked about classmates, comrades-in-arms and educated youth. A specific period breeds a specific feeling. Comrades-in-arms came from all corners of the country. They gathered together for three years. They left each other at once. The soldiers who were beaten by iron platters and running water constantly cut the war friendship. The educated youth who had been working together in the countryside for many years, eating and sleeping together, naturally gathered a deep feeling. And the relationship between classmates is the most common. Almost everyone has been to school, so there is a relationship between classmates. My primary school classmates met each other again after decades. I’m afraid it’s hard to recognize each other again. Due to the passing of times, their appearance changed greatly. Only those outstanding performances can make people remember. When I was in primary school, one of my classmates was very thin and tall, and he was also fond of making troubles. According to his appearance, my classmates gave him a nickname called thin crutch. Although thin crutch was tall, but he was often pressed down and hit his ass after making trouble. Another classmate was very sturdy, as fat as wax gourd, and he was more fond of making trouble. His classmate gave him a nickname called pee bucket. Once in a while, my classmates met each other on the way. They didn’t mind even when they said hello to each other, so they came to talk with you happily. Later, he went to Shenzhen to work hard and became a rich man, but the urine bucket caused sudden cardiac death due to overwork. In the future, his classmates couldn’t help talking about him, so they could only pursue the past of primary school in glittering tears. When I went to middle school, I lived most of the time because my school was far away from home. At that time, power outage had become a habit. My classmate Cheng Jun often invited me to his home to review my lessons at this time. I couldn’t help asking for it, so the kerosene light of Cheng Jun’s house was lit up until late at night. His grandmother often carries several boiled eggs when we are tired of homework, which is our best midnight snack. Now, Cheng has been admitted to a famous school and become a parent in a certain place, and his career is booming. After entering the university, my classmates came from all over the country. They gathered together in Mandarin with different local characteristics, learned and lived together, and shared similar feelings. Sometimes they tell anecdotes in their hometown dialect, which is wonderful and accurate, which often makes people laugh. When a female classmate came to the dormitory to visit a male classmate from a fellow countryman, the chair was already full, then the male classmate said: let’s go to bed! When the words came out, all the students in the dormitory burst into laughter. Only they were confused and didn’t know why they laughed. It turned out that this dialect was translated into Mandarin: We sat by the bed and chatted! In 2008, the college classmates had a classmate party, and everyone had become a father and a mother. This gathering, they became more mature and indifferent to the hippie smiling faces of the past. Returning to the branch of the division, the white tower still stands on the bank of Ganjiang River, just a few mottled. The White Tower held by dreams still silently stared at the east, the sailing boats shuttling back and forth in the surging river, and the Green Mountains along the riverside were still silently staring at the huge waves beating both sides and surging north, but the beautiful peach blossom forest was replaced by factories one after another. The college has moved to the Golden district as a whole, and we have been searching for the former campus site all the way. However, the numerous shops made us lost our direction and only left the dream of one place on the civilized Avenue. After the party, the students went their own way. After 15 years of waiting, several days of gathering and separation, I felt like a dream suddenly. Between students, know belong, even live far apart, also cut constantly thick students love. A classmate said well: there was an experience called classmate, a relationship called classmate, and a relationship called classmate. 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Finally, the doctor also said I was…