The perfect camouflage

Recently, I felt very happy and sad. Seeing that he could cheat me to my second aunt’s house every day and then sit down and stick to mahjong, I didn’t know anything but walked back alone, in fact every time I are very sad, because every day he can let I walk alone and he but night half past twelve all don’t come back, yesterday actually 1 point 50 back, remember two days ago, dopted mother asked me that you didn’t care him when he went to play cards? I smiled and said that whatever he did was not losing my money. That day, my second aunt also said that I was not angry when he played cards every day? Not angry? Don’t care? Is my heart really like this? I smiled and said that I didn’t lose my money, but no one saw the entanglement in my heart. How I wished I wouldn’t live with him like a shrew, I always told myself naively that he had a sense of propriety and reputation in his heart. I always told myself that he was good, but until yesterday I was completely disappointed. It was the fourth time, every time I said that I didn’t play cards today, I always took me to my second aunt’s house forcibly. But every time it turned out to be a lie. Mahjong might be better for him. I told myself to give him three chances, I won’t forgive after three times, because I always like the three principles that nothing can be done. But until he made it for the fourth time in a row, thinking that it was two or three o’clock in the morning when he woke up yesterday, and thinking that his mother said that they were very dangerous. I was so worried about him that I was afraid of his accident, unexpectedly, I got up from the bed and took the cellphone which was turned off without electricity. I hurried to find another battery to replace it, because the time of turning off the cellphone was not accurate, and I was afraid that I made a mistake, so I immediately went to QQ to check the time. The QQ time showed 12: 57. My heart was broken, and I was also scared. It hurt-because he didn’t care if I had any ideas, he was afraid because he came back at about 12: 30 in the past, but last night he was not afraid of his safety at midnight. I remember that the mahjong parlor of my second aunt’s was only open to 12: 00. Under the circumstance of extreme confusion, I dialed his phone and heard his slow voice on the other side of the phone. I knew he was safe and I was not afraid. But I woke up at 1: 50, it was almost two o’clock, listening to the shouting outside the door, I was heartbroken and anxious. How could he do this? I plan not to open the door, But he heard that he opened the door one by one, until he shouted for a long time and sighed deeply. He didn’t shout or knock at the door after a while, I thought he was walking back, and suddenly I was scared, because his mother said there were a lot of people smoking powder. I got up and opened the door in fear. There was no one outside, so I ran to the stairwell and looked at the bottom of the building, because I was afraid that he would go back so late and he was not safe, but he appeared behind me. It turned out that he went into the toilet. I don’t know why, I always tell myself that I must be a little poisonous, but I can’t be poisonous at all. I feel that I have become so humble. Is it true that Tang Qin said that there is no dignity in love? I don’t know. This afternoon, I lied to him that I went to the central market instead of eating. In fact, apart from not being hungry, the key point is his irresponsible language again and again, I am afraid that the happiness I see now is actually the pain of the future. I am afraid that the possession of today and tomorrow will not be mine, so I dare not accept it boldly and squander boldly, maybe I am too sentimental when others see me, but I don’t want to have that nothingness any more, because if I want to have it, I don’t want to lose it. I have had enough time to face hypocritical faces all day long, I have lived enough days of absorbing my human flesh and blood with the flags of charity, because people all call me ungrateful, but I have to endure the days of cooking without oil, When I was starving, the celebrities were particularly noble at the end of the day, while I became a real villain who passed through the real pain, recently, his words and deeds remind me of those black days in the past. My heart is so painful… July 5th

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